Heart...

Anytime I hear the word "heart" I can't help but think of all the worry, sleepless nights, shaking with fear feelings, knowing that our sweet little baby needed to have open heart surgery. 

I do remember begging, pleading and falling on my knees several times with desperation asking God to fix her and to let us keep her. Especially that day we found out at 20 weeks pregnant that her heart would need mending. 

We had been praying and trying for a baby for so long and couldn't bear the thought of losing her. It's hard to think about it even now. My heart just pounds with fear, I can't think back on that day, the day I handed her over to the amazing team at the Stollery. 

There's not one picture from that August in 2014 that I can look at without breaking down, including this one. 

Those pictures bring me back, to the point where I feel I'm standing there staring at her, I couldn't leave her side, even when my family would beg me to leave I ended up asking if I could have one of those parent rooms, where I slept while someone else watched her every breath. 

She has our heart! She kind of just wrapped her being into our souls and we instantly loved her. Even my family from afar, they were wrapped in her love the moment they heard she existed.

And everyone knew they couldn't love her more, for everything she's been through, for who she is and for all the love she brings.